Murder Witness #4:
Lulu the spoiled gossip
LULU:
Ever hear your darkest secrets whispered back to you? Lulu probably leaked them between mirror glances and mascara touch-ups — a phone in one hand, a metaphorical knife in the other.
LULU'S TESTIMONY:
Int - Interrogation Room - Day
LULU
This better be quick. I'm like already bored.
INVESTEGATOR
Elsbeth was a family friend, right?
LULU
Yeah. We were close.
INVESTEGATOR
What happened at the theater, Lulu?
LULU
So, Elsbeth’s show was over—thank God, because
ballet is basically just foot torture with tutus
—and I was headed backstage to say hi. And
then BAM—there she was. Center stage, dead with
bullets surrounding her. It was giving total psycho
vibes.
INVESTEGATOR
Did you see anyone else?
LULU
Oh, yeah. Someone who looked like a walking
anti-hairbrush commercial with a shaggy red mane.
Beat.
LULU
She stormed out, all huffy and arrogant. Like she
was too good for murder cleanup duty or something.
